Idle Hands

I've been seriously considering going back to school. I got my GED and started college at 17 and never finished for multiple reasons, the biggest one being I have NO IDEA what I want to be when I "grow up". It always felt like such a permanent decision and I still don't know what I want to do at 22, imagine how uncertain I was at 17. I love lots of things but I've never been able to see myself in one specific profession. I really wanted to be an elementary school teacher but after taking my teaching classes and doing my observation hours I discovered that I don't want to be a teacher in Florida, maybe somewhere else, but I don't agree with or like the education system here. I thought about cosmetology but it's more of a fun hobby for me, not something I'd want to do day in and day out. Then I thought about writing, which I've always loved, I've always excelled at. I could be a writer, I love the stress and pressure of deadlines, I love being creative and I genuinely love writing, anything. So I've been looking into different schools around here and I'm hoping that soon I will be a student again and on the right track. I think going to school will help with my grief and depression, I don't work and I don't really feel ready or able to. I worked at a small community bank before Ayden was born and I don't have any experience outside of that so my options are limited. There are plenty of grocery stores I could go work and do something menial and mindless but that would put me in the middle of a veritable parade of babies, small children, and horrible parents... and I REALLY could not handle that; I have a hard time with all those things just going to the store to pick up a few things, so right now I think school is the best option and will be the right thing to help me get my life back together.