12

In twelve days it will be Ayden's first birthday...but he will NEVER be a year old, or two, or ten. He will always be two months old. On September 28th there will be no celebrating, there will be no cake, no presents, no family. Instead there will be tears, heartache, and painful memories. Instead of sitting back and thinking, "wow, a year ago today I was being induced, a year ago Ayden was born", I'll be thinking about  how wrong  everything is, how dark my  life has become. I will be going through the most important day of my life, without the person who made it important in the first place. All these thoughts and more are contributing to the continous, permanent empty ache in my soul. How am I supposed to be strong and hold on when my reason for doing so is gone?